I read a line in Tricks by Ellen Hopkins earlier. Yes, it made sense and related to it very well.
“No one wants to know what bothers me. Too hung up on their own problems.” -Ginger Cordell.
Makes me think that maybe I should just forget about everyone (okay, maybe except for like two or three people) and move along. Delete their numbers, unfollow from everywhere, and maybe unfriend too. Or maybe I’m just searching for attention, I mean that is what most Leos want 24/7. Attention. Maybe I’m just paranoid. That just makes me forever paranoid, I guess I’ll never be the same. I love him, but she’s my best friend. But then again she chose not one, but two different people over me. Where did that get her? More drama and hurt. I loved her for months, then when I get my chance it barely lasts a week. But that’s how I learned to forgive and forget. Well, forgive. It doesn’t matter though, it shouldn’t matter. I’m gone, and that’s all I’ve ever wanted to be. Away.
Dont give me any of that “You wouldnt understand” bullshit. You dont know what i’ve been through.
Am I paranoid or is everything seem like its falling apart faster than usual? Tell me that I’m just paranoid and that you still love more than ever. But I know that probably won’t happen due to you hanging out with your bad influence friends. Even if you did hate them a few days ago. Just, I don’t know. Make me feel welcome in this world again rather than your invader lover I guess. How would you define me?
I always get too excited for things before I ask. I have to stop doing that or else one day ill say something I regret.
I feel like I’ve made the worlds stupidest decision, but you can’t help it when you love someone… But I’m such a bad lover that it makes sense.
Today, as you were explaining everything my heart was shattering. And as you said “I love you” I thought of all the reasons why I love you. Yes, between those three short words I came up with a list of reasons why I love you. Ill write it down and give it to you tomorrow.
All I want is for you to tell me that everything is going to be alright. Tell me that you love me and tell me that as long as you have me you’ll be fine. And I know they say crying shows that youre human, but I just can’t bring myself to do so. I wish that everything would be normal like it used be but all she can think about is getting me back by stealing my friends and think of arrogant, annoying, and snappy comebacks for no reason at all. Did I cause this? Help me, please. I need you.
I like you, I really do but im not sure if I should have a relationship right before I leave. I would love for us to just have that sneak-out-to-the-restroom-and-make-out relationship but im not sure if you’d be up for it.
Am I not perfect enough? I know that I’m not her and I understand that. I’m done wanting to be her. But do I meet your standards? Or are they too high for me to reach for? I know because I spent so much time on him it seems like I like to play games. But I don’t, I now what I want. I want you.
I like you, I really do. But honestly everyday I notice each if your flaws. But strange enough, I see something amazing happen too. And I just do happen to like you more and more each day.
Your laugh is adorable, and when we talk on the phone its like the conversations are magical. Sometimes I wish we could just go out already but I know its not going to happen.
Listening to your texts almost made me cry. It made me feel lonely. It made me feel like no matter what no one will make me as happy as he makes you.
Don’t worry sweetheart, I’m just as shocked as you are. But what I don’t understand is that when I told you that I had feelings for you, you automatically thought about him. And I understand I’m being selfish but I thought you’d care that although he’s a jackass you’d to realize that you have my heart (even though you’re sharing it with someone else). I thought you’d be the one to understand that although I happen to be falling for a girl I’m still the same person. And although he has your heart you’d find a spare spot for me to sit there and daydream about what could be even if you and my best friend where screwing each other behind the bushes.
